In a Split Second

In a split second, my world was thrown into chaos.

It was July 10, 2024, the day I had been counting down to be with my children and grandchildren in Zurich.

I had a spring in my step, and a smile constantly graced my face all the way to the airport. I landed in Frankfurt and headed towards the escalator to passport control for my connecting flight to Zurich.

As I approached the escalator, an elderly woman stepped in front of me. She stood a few steps ahead of me with her trolley bag at the edge of the step. Before I could ask her to move her bag further onto the step, the bag flipped and knocked her off balance.

I instinctively reached out my left hand to try to stop her fall, but I could not hold her. She slid to the bottom of the escalator on her back. I nearly tumbled after her, but I was glad I held tight onto the railing with my right hand.

Fortunately, a gentleman at the bottom of the escalator quickly pressed the STOP button, bringing it to a halt. I breathed a sigh of relief when the elderly woman stood up, retrieved her bag, and slowly climbed the steps.

Just then, my thoughts were interrupted by a shooting pain that struck me like a thunderbolt. Drowning in dread, I looked down at my left palm and fingers. They were tingling and rapidly swelling, causing intense pain. Although I did not hear a cracking or snapping sound, I knew for sure that I had fractured my palm. Determined not to miss my flight to Zurich, I tried to push through the pain and clutched my left hand with my right.

On my way to passport control, I saw the elderly lady and asked if she was okay. She responded with a thank you.

After a 55-minute flight, I arrived in Zurich and immediately rushed to the hospital. A few hours later, I emerged with my forearm, palm, and fingers wrapped in a cast. I had sustained a spiral fracture on the back of my left palm below the ring finger. My heart sank as I realized the extent of my injury. I was scared, angry, and sad.

What a twist to my eagerly awaited holiday!

The entire experience left me emotionally shaken.

I struggled to come to terms with what had happened, trying to convince myself that it was just a minor accident. However, the emotional toll was overwhelming and weighed heavily on me. I experienced a range of intense emotions, including helplessness, vulnerability, sadness, anger, guilt, frustration, shock, and a lack of motivation.

My loved ones were concerned about my behaviour, which was not typical of me. I constantly felt on edge, making social interactions draining, and I often sought solitude to process my thoughts and feelings and avoid the pressure and expectations of others.

Even simple tasks became overwhelming due to my physical limitations, and I had to rely on others for my basic needs.

Returning home from a 3-week stay in Zurich evoked mixed emotions.

At first, it was a welcome respite and surprisingly peaceful. The solitude allowed me to reflect deeply on my experiences in a quiet environment.

However, as days went by, I found myself increasingly overwhelmed by feelings of helplessness, vulnerability, and tearfulness. Everyday tasks that I used to take for granted, such as bathing, tying my hair into a ponytail, and getting dressed became difficult for me. Even simple actions like pulling up my jeans and fastening a belt or using a shoehorn to put on my shoes or eating with cutlery required extra effort. I also needed help with household chores, cooking, and grocery shopping.

It was difficult to maintain a positive mindset and not dwell on the serious implications of this fracture.

Life is full of unpredictable twists and turns, and this accident was one that I never saw coming.

My fracture has healed, but after almost seven weeks in a cast and splint, I am currently focussing on exercises to regain the strength and movement of my fingers.

On a more positive note, I have come to understand the importance of self-care and the value of open communication. After my accident, I struggled to articulate my feelings and emotions and felt a heightened need for control.

It is okay to ask for help.

I often underestimate the power of reaching out to my family and friends. I am hesitant because of my pride in being independent or because I do not want to burden them with my problems and worries. I now recognize that this conflict stems from my self-perception and that my loved ones are often more willing to help than I think.

“Me Time” – Prioritizing my needs over those of others when depleted.

I am learning not to feel guilty and confidently communicating to others that I need some “Me Time.” Although I don’t necessarily have to ask for it, I make an effort to express my feelings and need for time alone in a polite manner.

Developing a resilient mindset.

While I know I am strong and resilient, I sometimes struggle to reinforce this belief when dealing with my current circumstances. To continue cultivating resilience, I constantly remind myself of my strengths, am open to change, and effectively manage my emotions, thoughts, and behaviour.

Stronger Relationships.

Expressing myself openly and clearly has made my conversations with my family and friends more honest. We now have a deeper understanding of each other’s perspectives, and we can better appreciate our differences in opinions and beliefs while respecting each other’s boundaries.

Recovery is a personal journey. Staying positive, focusing on my progress, and taking one day at a time will make a difference.

Sharing my experiences and thoughts gives me a sense of relief and tranquility. Writing is incredibly cathartic.